Finally, someone needs to ask: confident in order to come across that way. Related: 10 gay dating tips that should be obvious You see confidence is something we build by doing. A straight spine communicates strength and purpose. But if you don’t make good eye contact, how can anyone see in?
And so if you want other gay men to think you are confident, you have to carry yourself in a way that transmits that message. Read them all in order to fully absorb their deeper meaning. Learning how to establish strong eye contact can be hard at first but mastering this skill is essential if you want to communicate confidence. But that doesn’t mean you have to wait until you feel confident in order to start dating.
First, you have to work up the nerve to put yourself out there.
Second, there’s the challenge of determining mutual attraction.
Getting back out there takes time, but there are a few things you can do to get started and regain some of those dating skills that have been dormant.
You know it’s important — a key to success in business, relationships, and life. Barrie has written before on the ways self-confidence impacts your income and improves your likelihood of getting noticed and promoted at work. Maybe you’re in a coffee shop or just walking down the street. They think to themselves, “I’m running late,” or “I’ll talk to them next time,” and they pass up the opportunity to meet somebody new who could be potentially amazing for them. And sometimes they're rewarded with an incredible relationship that enriches their life in a significant way. Confidence lets you ask for the phone number, it lets you make the first call, it lets you lean in for the kiss. You can have friends, but no romantic relationships. Now imagine the same show, except you get to meet as many people as you like. It makes you know, really know with 100% assurance, that you are amazing, that you can find someone to date you whenever you want, and that you don’t have to settle for anything less than ecstatic in your relationships.
What about those times when you feel you don't have what it takes to attract a loving relationship into your life or to sustain one you already have? You have a month to get to know each one, and then you get a choice: pick one to marry or spend your entire life alone.
She's also talked about the ways confidence improves your self-image and allows you to have a healthy attitude about your physical appearance. You see someone that strikes your fancy, and you think, “Wow, that sure is an attractive fella/lady.” And then? The person who’s next-level confident — those who are self-assured enough to push past excuses and discomfort? You’re willing to go for what you want, because you know if you don’t get it, you’re still going to be okay. After all, who you end up with in life may be the most important decision you ever make. How amazing would someone have to be for you to pick them? Every time you decide you don’t like someone, you can “next” them. You get to play forever until you find someone you connect with and absolutely adore. And which show do you think gets you a better life partner? When you feel that way, you give yourself permission to have incredibly high standards and really screen people to see if you are a good fit for each other.
So I guess opposites attract, or I just enjoy the awkward interactions/comical antics of doing activities with someone much taller than I? Standing out (physically) my whole life has led me to be much more confident and fearless of being different. There are definitely a lot of great guys who only see six feet as one small part of who I am.
However, I also deal with so many ignorant men who make a huge deal about my height, probably to bury their own insecurity or intimidation.
Kevin: I'm not one to complain about being short, because once you realize you can shop in the children's section and climb on top of things to get to out-of-reach objects, you're pretty much on a level playing field with the rest of the world. I think a lot of guys fetishize the height gap and say things like, "I'm so into you because you're so short," or "It's really hot knowing that I could lift you up in bed," etc.