Facing uncharted dating territory without your usual liquid courage can increase your risk for relapse.
While some people can easily relate to and embrace the fact that everyone has a past, others can find it hard to reconcile the two.
If you’ve decided to move forward with the relationship, here are some dos and don’ts that will make dating someone in recovery a lot easier for both of you.
It’s been more than 15 years since my last drink or drug.
I credit the 12 steps for helping me rebuild my life and have attended tons of meetings (probably around 4000, but who’s counting? When I found recovery I was single, never married with no kids and strung out on more than drugs and alcohol—I was addicted to attention from men.
After dating one dud after another, you finally find someone who seems to have it all – thoughtful, witty, responsible – and good-looking to boot.
Then they drop a bomb: “I used to be a drug addict.” They may as well have said, “I’m married.” But does one partner being in recovery automatically spell doom for a relationship?
Recovering addicts don’t expect perfection in their partners, having learned firsthand that it doesn’t exist.
And they have committed – in recovery and in life – to honesty and integrity and making decisions in accordance with their values.
“Listen, before we do this, I need to tell you something...”I agree.
That’s one of the main upsides to dating somebody who’s also sober.
If your partner needs support, couples counseling and ALANON meetings are recommended.